Decisive love

god didn't make life's potholes, but he uses good roads and bad to draw us to him. he plays the long game, patiently waiting for us to hear him calling. knowing the lord from childhood, like i did, does not make us immune. rough roads do not discriminate, even for physicians.our first pothole was a biggie. little laura, our second daughter, suffered from the intrauterine effects of one of stacy's medications. she would be a three-month-old baby even to the day we watched her leave us twenty-four years later. my pain often left me with my face to the floor, weeping before god, still some four years after she died. we prayed in "faith," but we really never thought about what we had faith in. if god is all-powerful, wouldn't he do most anything we asked, because nothing is impossible for him? even demons believe god is all powerful, and they tremble. believing in his power is not faith.god is not a genie, and he doesn't give out wishes just because we "rubbed the lamp." he loves us with an unchanging, steadfast love. even if he did not heal laura miraculously, his love never changed. he grieved with us.if he had healed her miraculously, would we ever be satisfied with just "three wishes?" like a spoiled child, we would come to despise him if all he is just "mr. fixit."what is decisive love? who is this god who cares so much?his love is the substance of our faith. he's everything we ever needed.