The reverend a novel

why not then remain pure in body, if not in heart? for one, my marriage had made me cynical; for another, my faith was no longer unassailable. never having heard god say anything, i found too many contradictions in the body of theological non-knowledge as interpreted by baptist doctrine. i was ready to stray, the principal deterrent being my childhood training, or lack of it. i knew only what they told me. and about women, they told me precious little. how could i conceal from myself that the ever present, all powerful, all knowing god of my sermons-that personal, loving father-was a stranger to me, even as i insisted that my listeners must surrender to him or face eternal damnation and punishment? would i spend the rest of my life as a sexually frustrated hypocrite? should i continue to preach and pray when i was convinced that prayer changes nothing? or should i be the real me and sample some of the pleasurable bounty of god's creations? one vote for pleasure. it's unanimous and so ordered.